It all happened way back in October '97....
I was sitting across from where you see, in the tiny town of Bay St Louis one fine day. The water shimmered, the air seemed mystical somehow, giving everything a certain glow.
I was certainly happy, having "emptied" myself of a lot of darkness, mostly by writing. This purging had led me on that day to a time I shall never forget.
What happened was this: I walked into the city's main church, Our Lady of the Gulf Cathedral where my great-grandma used to go when she was little. I stood there in the back of the church, drawn by I did not know what.
After a few minutes of staring at a stained glass window, I became conscious of some ladies praying up near the altar, out of sight. Only their saying their daily prayers- Our Lady's most holy Rosary.
I'd so long out of attending Church, I didn't even recongize it then as being the Rosary. I just was aware of the steely strength of the prayers themselves- the Apostles' Creed, Our Fathers, Hail Marys and Glory Be-s.
In the midst of these, I felt the presence of Jesus like I never have before. Suddenly I felt leaden and compelled to sit there in the back pew.
I know I must have had a "Charlie Brown" expression on my face. You know, that half-frown, half-smile that the late Charles Schulz's famous cartoon character gets (usually when he's dealing with Lucy).
In short I wanted to flee then and there, knowing how much a sinner I was, how unworthy I was of Jesus' total sacrifice of himself in the Cross.
But the thing was, I couldn't, and he spoke to me in no words that I can utter. Just ponder in my heart.